Oregon Media Insiders

Winston Churchill pointed out that, “Success is going from failure to failure without a loss of enthusiasm.”

Churchill was prescient. His timeless observation is most apt in describing the Portland media, the members of which have been careening from failure to failure for decades. And despite my abhorrence for the man, I am beginning to agree with Rush Limbaugh’s aphorism for the “mainstream media.” Limbaugh refers to that illustrious group as “the drive-by media.” Limbaugh’s politics may be from the Neanderthal era, but his take on the media is particularly well suited for the Portland media, specifically those in broadcast television. Of course, the thought that PDX television is largely phoning-it-in will cause paroxysms amongst the network affiliates. Those over-worked, underpaid journalists will tell you, in all seriousness, that they are doing more and more with less and less when the inverse is much closer to the truth.

The editorial staff populating Portland TV newsrooms will swear on whatever holy book you wish that they are struggling at the top of their abilities to keep John Q. Public informed even as station management holds them in contempt. These frantic video journalists will tell you that their reality is nightmarish. Portland reporters hold dearly to the delusion that without their services and contributions, the metro area is but a group of monkeys with car keys. Reality, these hard-boiled news veterans say, is grim but TV will bring it to the viewer anyway. Albert Einstein put it best, though, when he said, “Reality is merely an illusion, albeit a very persistent one.”

It is that persistence that leads my detractors, of which there are many, to shout at the universe. For instance, consider this incandescent comment from someone named TALPDX regarding my last belle’s lettres:

“Nothing screams success like having OMI's interminable joke Hunter Thompson call you out – it’s like listening to the class geek trying to make a funny -- but nobody laughs and then he gets beaten up after class.”

Need anyone say anything more?

Portland TV News producers should find solace in this skillfully-crafted epistolary bequeathed by an angst-filled Anonymous Source in deft support of the Drive-By cause.

“Hear that Deafening Silence, Hunter? That's the sound of hundreds of OMI users ignoring your incessant bloviating.”

This person must work in the commercial end of the television business. Notice how he/she CAPITALIZED the First Letter in all the words of his/her first statement, with the excepted preposition “that.” It reads like an old Tom Peterson furniture ad. However, Anonymous did get the punctuation right, an indication that he/she attended school beyond grade 8.

And lastly, a school-marmish scolding aimed at this writer and a stern but loving warning to all OMI readers from the owner-operator of the esteemed website:

“Trolls wander into every website… Please don't feed them. Trolls want attention. That's why they're trolls. Don't give it to them. Thank you.”

Any serious practitioner of psychology will tell you that the above words appear to castigate me, but the tone rings hollow. The creators of this normally sleepy web site are thrilled about the cry for my head by so many. The self-proclaimed Fairy Blog Mother wants you to think she is disgusted by the thought of a Troll (such a cute term) having wormed into her world. In reality, the Fairy Blog Mother and her erstwhile partner, the affable “cablenut” are secretly overjoyed now that I have dropped in unannounced and am seen to be stirring the pot. The blog duet can now approach their advertisers and point to the steady increase in traffic as a result of my efforts. Here’s something for PDX investigative reporters to consider - you cannot be 100% certain that it isn't’ the operators of this site penning the Hunter Thompson byline for their (our) own gain. While none of this can be proven, it makes for interesting speculation, and a good story…don’t you think?

Hunter